October 19, 2010

Vacation 21: Things I loved, things I learned, and stuff that annoyed the crap out of me...

We just returned from a whirlwind Connecticut/New York/ Boston vacation, visiting family, seeing Broadway shows, encouraging my husband to spend his money. So as I love lists and love opinions (especially mine), here is the vacation summary you are waiting for:

1- Two hours sleep the night before a day of travel, not a good idea.

2- Sleeping with a frequent traveller has its privileges, in this case upgrades to business class there and back. Niiiice.

3- Air Canada is annoying with it's fervent insistence that I turn my Kindle off during take-off and landing, because yes my reading I Know I Am, But What Are You with the wireless off is really gonna bring down the plane. Unlike the 23 people using their blackberries to bid on ebay and view porn.

4-Airplane viewing: the Tom Cruise Cameron Diaz flick Knight and Day is really as bad as everyone says it is.

5- Crossing into the US for the first time on one blue declaration form, as a same-sex married couple, a family, felt very cool and was way smoother than expected.

6- Good vacation reading: Fly Away Home by Jennifer Weiner (chic lit), really good vacation reading: Star Island by Carl Hiaasen (humour, suspense).

7- Unexpected way to spend four hours on a sunny Sunday afternoon in Connecticut: three grown men, one broken basketball hoop, a visit to Homo Depot, 375 pounds of sand, an empty bottle of Welch's Grape Juice and a very sharp knife.

8- Kids always cry, as soon as they get hurt. And they can multi-task: cry and look around to ensure are being heard, cry and run.

9- There is a card game called Egyptian Rat Screw.

10- Stephen Harper, take note: my niece's grade one class has a good model for interpersonal and international relations: if you do or say something wrong, you go to the time-out chair and think about what you did for ten minutes, then come back and rejoin the group.

11- When you buy a used cell phone in Denmark, get ready to find lots of texts you don't understand, and a short video of a very pale man in only a lacy thong washing a car. We chose to believe he lost a bet.

12- When you are walking by the Port Authority Bus Terminal in New York and hear one upstanding citizen say very loudly to another upstanding citizen, "Honey, I KNOW you iz a dedicated ho!"... accelerate.

13- Apple has trademarked the expression "there's an app for that."

14- The Hersheys store in Times Square is no longer giving out samples as you walk in.

15- The new Pop Tart World off Broadway is giving out samples a plenty, and it is easy to spend $28 there, including your customized Varietizer pack where you choose your six Pop Tart flavours and watch the sky high vending machine assemble your package. I recommend Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough and S'mores.

16- There are 13 thousand cabs in New York. And if Cash Cab really exists there, those bastards have actively avoided picking me up.

17- Fab British fashion designer Sir Paul Smith doesn't do sketches, says he can't really draw. He does detailed word descriptions instead.

18- Former Will and Grace star Sean Hayes is amazing live on Broadway in Promises, Promises. As are Kristin Chenowith and Molly Shannon.

19- Grown-up's should know better. Exhibit A: the oh so classy woman enjoying the free booze in business class, shouting at her companion, aka the also drinking guy sitting right beside her, both wearing headphones: JUST REMEMBER WE BOTH CAN'T BE IMPAIRED GETTING OFF THIS PLANE.

20- Expensive hotels should do better. The Super 8 gives free internet access, yet Boston Westin Copley charges for it? Penny pinchers. Cheapskates. Niiiiice.

21- Special thanks to the friendly Air Canada flight attendant who was warm and chatty and let me play with his iPad. Get your mind out of the gutter, people, it really was his iPad and I soooo want one. Still working on rationalizing that expense....


Elly Lou said...

You were right here and I didn't see you?!?! Rocco is WORKING on Promises, Promises even! Boo. Hiss!

Even though I'm incredibly mad at you, I have to admit I did a little fist pump for #5. Awww yeah.

vickilikesfrogs said...

I want more details on #7!

Michael Rivers said...

What a great recap!! I need a vacation so bad. Sounds like fun! It's been 4 years since I was last in NYC. Need to get back.

Ray's Cowboy said...

#21. If that what they are called these days. I must go see If I can find someone's I-Pad to play with.

You are very lucky to be able to travel and with the Man you love.


Brahm (alfred lives here) said...

@ Elly Lou -- oops, sorry, I did intend up front to get in touch with some bloggers to meet up live and got too jammed for time. Coming back next year for sure!

@ Vicki - my brother and family are in Conn., their basketball hoop was downed by a storm and the water-filled base was cracked open, so the plan was to fill the damn thing with sand. It is huge, we did not have a really good plan. Hours later it is up and a tad wobbly...

Ron said...

Sounds like you guy had a wonderful time!

12- When you are walking by the Port Authority Bus Terminal in New York and hear one upstanding citizen say very loudly to another upstanding citizen, "Honey, I KNOW you iz a dedicated ho!"... accelerate.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAA! OMG, how funny! Yeah, and that's when you KNOW you're in NYC!

It's my favorite city on the eastcoast. Brash, bold, sensory overload...but it's a one-of-a-kind GEM!

Megan (Best of Fates) said...

1. I can't wait to see Promises, Promises - I'm glad it's as good as I've heard!

2. I'm dying to read Hiaasen's latest, but am trying to be cheap and wait for it to show up at my used books store. Sadly, I have no patience, so this is difficult.

3. Canadians don't know about Egyptian Rat Screw? It's the mark of a happy childhood!

4. I'm strangely tempted to buy a used European phone. And yes, you can feel free to judge me for that.

5. There is a steadfast rule about hotels - the more expensive the less you get. In everything. Internet access, breakfast, you name it, if you stay at a ritzy hotel they know you're gonna be willing to pay for it.

Annie (Lady M) x said...

I lurrrvvve no.8. Kids do cry, but they have a brief period before hitting the ground and deciding whether they are going to cry or not. It is called the 'parent's hiatus'. A brief moment of respite before the damage limitation begins!

Great list ... it made me laugh my head off!

Saucy B said...

Quite a trip! I know what you mean about the annoyance of upscale hotels NOT giving free Internet access. Makes no sense.
And good to know Sean Hayes is still in that play. Thought I might have missed it already. Although seeing Next to Normal is on tap next month for me and my mom.

Brahm (alfred lives here) said...

@ Saucy B --- I have heard Next to Normal is terrific, that was another one we talked about! And yes see Sean Hayes, he is terrific in the show!

bmat10 said...

There is a Pop Tart World? See I knew there was a heaven.

injaynesworld said...

What a helluva vacation you had. Thanks for sharing the high/low lights. ;)

Brahm (alfred lives here) said...

Yes was a helluva vacation, and yes there is a Pop Tart world, is brand new, and is awesome!

Kevin said...

Sounds like a great trip! Where are we going next? Lucky for you about the FREE upgrades to business class!

Brahm (alfred lives here) said...

Yes, lucky for me that my over-travelled husband got us upgraded! Not going anywhere for awhile now, gotta work.... and move... and work...

Jabacue said...

Not a so bad trip.....considering.

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