Sometimes life is amazing. And sometimes it blows chunks of smelly moist crap. And sometimes even when life is great, there are those stupid whiny moronic things and people and comments who annoy the crap out of me...
1- Supermarkets who screw us over with mislabelling. I just saw this expose on CBC about Canadian supermarkets mislabelling fresh fish and substituting cheaper fish or endangered - yes, endangered- fish for what is supposed to be in there. Smug bastards. I know I am getting screwed somehow.
2- The President's Choice ice cream personality test at icecreamshop.pc.ca: I am a banana split? Really? Because I am "a treat to be around"? Blech. I am no frigging treat. Could be worse, I guess you could have said I am something sickening sweet like bubblegum flavoured.
3- Mel Gibson. For sooo many reasons...
4- Andrew Giuliani, son of former mayor Rudolph Giuliani. And nope, I don't know him either. He annoys me because he is a jerkwad example of stupid trivial lawsuits. This douchebag goes to Duke university, where he was cut from the golf team. SO HE SUED THE UNIVERSITY.
5- That Slap Chop infommercial guy. Stop yelling!
6- Tae Kwon Do monkeys who attack their trainers (yes really, I don't make this shit up).
7- Dogs who bark at wind. And vacuums. And people walking by on the street. Not that I am naming names...
8- Gay activist Larry Kramer, who this week publicly trashed his former friend Barbra Streisand. Shape up, dude... gay men do not trash a diva!
9- Lindsay Lohan. At a certain age, and you are there, babe, bad parenting and teenage stupidity expire as excuses. Shut up and go away forever.
10- Guys with mullets and rat tails wearing wife beaters who smoke cigarettes while driving their red pick-up trucks. There's like 18 things wrong with this, and this was my view on the way home the other day...
11- Smally furry dogs who empty 15 toys out of the toybox (yes, he has a toybox) and spread them all over the floor to then choose one to play with, abandoning the others spread out everywhere; who trained you anyhow?
12- People who point at their wrist while asking for the time. I know where my watch is, jerkwad, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the bathroom is?
On the Rag, Vol. 299
9 hours ago