March 20, 2011

The business travel gods are out to get me...

Last week was supposed to be easy, seamless even --- a quick three-day business trip, a road trip so not even the hassle of airport security who seem gleeful when they 'randomly' select me or my bags for an extensive search or full-body scan.

My coworker J and I set out early one morning, picked up our rental car, a Kia Rondo, who the hell has even heard of a Rondo, and we set out on our journey...

1- checking into hotel, J gets upgraded suite on 20th floor, I get tiny room on the fifth floor beside the ice machine. I am happy for her. Bitch.

2- driving through Calgary with my trusty GPS "Karen", she says take make a U-turn right now! Uh-huh. I can see our destination far ahead on the right. Where the hell are you taking me?

3- out for sushi with a friend that night, realise on drive back to hotel that she is headed in wrong direction. and driving wrong way in centre lane.

4- breakfast the next day, I am all showered, shaved, suited up and ready for the day, and spill ketchup all over my tie. Obsess over clumsiness. Yep I am a polished professional. Quick tie change ensues, yesterday's tie makes an encore appearance.

5- getting ready the next day, I cannot find my cuff links. I search the hotel room, my suitcase, laundry bag, everywhere. Report them as missing to hotel. Silently suspect housekeeping stole them,while leaving the laptop and iPad untouched. Go through day with long flappy shirt sleeves rolled up.

6- treat myself to a present after end of long day, buy amazing leather bag (yes I am a man bag whore) and bring it home that night. Next day zipper falls off.

7- Getting close to home that night after 15-hour day, drunk guy is prowling in middle of road, waving a pizza box, approaches my car singing in what I suspect is really bad Spanish. I commit small traffic infraction to avoid drunken pizza guy.

8- Next day find my cuff links buried in pocket of suitcase, beneath ketchup tie. Oops.

Ah, travel is so much fun sometimes......


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