The mainstays of my diet for these days? Hot tea, iced tea, huge amounts of lozenges, assorted types of soup, vanilla ice cream, licorice allsorts, and jellybeans... so clearly a well-thought out blend of I am sick with the worst sore throat in the history of the world and I am stuck at home oh woe is me comfort food.
I hate being sick. Being sick blows. And this week it blows a sandpaper sore throat, pounding headaches, a fever, crazy nasal congestion, Tylenol cold medicine, Tylenol with codeine for the headaches, gooey cough medicine, a prescription nasal spray gizmo, and waterfalls of snot.
Plus my sunburn on my forehead is peeling... so yep i am a big mess.
I have been home for three days. I hate missing work because (a) the days are totally wasted when you are at home with the god of mischief pounding on your head, praying for death and (b) the work just waits for you anyway! And I can't talk without feeling scratchy and headachey, which is a huge problem for a talker like me. Oh just give me a mallet to the head and end this once and for all...
Yesterday K stayed home to take care of me -- drove me to the doctor, made sure I was eating stuff beyond lozenges and jellybeans, took care of the doggies. I resisted this at first, and then came to totally appreciate it.
I hate being sick. My first instinct when I am sick is I just want the whole world to go the eff away and let me suffer in silence while I watch daytime TV, bemoan my hideous fate, and self-medicate. Is that so wrong?
I hate being sick. Today I go back to work. There is stuff to do, people depending on me, and I am getting cabin fever. Drugs will be my friend.
I hate being sick. Someone needs to come up with a cure for the flu. Screw the oil companies and arms companies and their billions of profits - this is where there is money to be made!
I hate being sick. I am not scared of it, I just hate it. What is there to be scared of? You are going to get better, or not. It's not like it's ceiling fans... those are terrifying. And just wrong.
Samantha Bee Returns With a Vengeance
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