December 8, 2011

What the hell is Facebook trying to tell me?

Like many of you, I have regularly visit "the facebook"... (uh, catch up and see The Social Network if you don't get the reference).

So aside from endless vacation pictures, status updates from my friends, Huffington Post news blips, and quizzes to determine which Golden Girl I am, there are lots of ads the screen which I pretty much ignore.

Facebook tailors the ads to you, based on your profile and friends and location and other secret voodoo stuff. So if the ads I see are tailored to me, what the hell is Facebook trying to tell me?

Here are the ads targeted to me recently:

Call of Duty MW3: a violent video game... uh, why? I don't like violence or video games.

Up99.3 100% Christmas Music: this is an Edmonton Radio station I have stopped listening to precisely because they are entirely Christmas music, since early November, so too much and too early. Spent all the advertising dollars you want, Up Radio, you are dead to me.

Cheesleeve: a cheese storage sleeve with a built-in grater... why does this exist? And why is the ad tailored to me?

Jann Arden live in concert: Yes love her. I have seen her in concert and have tickets to see her again in February. Good call, Facebook.

NetFlix Free Trial: okay, this one makes sense to me, as I love movies and spend lots of time online.

Edmonton Groupon: I didn't know Groupon was here in town, and aren't they totally discredited by now? There has been lots of bad press I have been ignoring... are they relevant anymore?

Win Men's Underwear from But I don't wear underwear... uh, kidding. I am guessing this goes to every gay guy to promote a shirtless guys website. Or maybe it is just me. Do I need new underwear, Facebook? How closely are you watching me...?

Criminal Record Pardons: Why, what have you heard...?

Canadian Pardon Deadline: um, I sense a theme here.....

Love Kylie Minogue? Yes. Yes I do. Cuz I'm gay. Actually an ad for a radio station in London.

You Never Outgrow Toys: Good headline copywriters! And okay I clicked through to see what this was... electronics? Lego? Sex toys? Nah... It's wireless phones, totally disappointing.

Ford Focus: uh, no.

Free Red Hot Super Slots: Really, free? What's the business plan for that?

#1 Slots for Men: Presumably another gambling site. But sounds really dirty...

Wheel of Fortune Slots: uh, hello, gamblers anonymous...

Criminal pardons, gambling, Kylie, Christmas music and a totally weird cheese sleeve gadget.... So... What the hell are you trying to tell me Facebook?


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