January 6, 2010

Fat Tuesday... and pass those damn jellybeans over here!

Three things happened Tuesday that got me thinking about being fat, none of them directly linked to my already vanished non-committal non-resolutions for 2010. (And not that it matters, I have been chubby, I have been skinny, and I am currently somewhere around 'average' whatever the hell that means).

1- I cleared my schedule and announced was going to the gym that evening (and by cleared my schedule I mean that I loudly proclaimed to my partner that I would not be spending the evening comatose on the sofa watching NCIS).

2- In the news (and by in the news I mean in blogs online) I read an article about that obnoxious website beautiful.com kicking out like 5,000 members for chubbing out over the holidays. I have read about these jerks before (and by I have read I mean watched their reality TV show about coming to Canada), and as I understand it you have to apply (and by apply I mean turn off your brain and grovel), and then all their skinny superficial snobby stupid Paris Hilton wanna-be members vote you in or out based on your world vision and spiritual awareness (and by world vision and spiritual awareness I mean your picture).

3- Later that night I watched the premiere episode of Drop Dead Diva (and by premiere episode I mean yes the first ever, which is a couple of years old, but I live in another damn time zone where apparently television runs two years behind) about a vain blonde actress who dies and comes back as a smart successful fat lawyer chick. You gotta LOVE her.

And I didn't even bother to count those endless Jenny Craig commercials. I mean I love Valerie Bertinelli, but really, go the fuck away already!

So... three separate fat things in one day; is it total coincidence, or is the universe trying to tell me something? Like... hey you, put down the laptop, put down the curried cashews, put down the jellybeans, push aside the canine, and go get your butt on a treadmill?

So... going beyond moi, I am thinking holy crap, are so many of us focused so much on weight? Is our society so obsessed over weight? And is this somehow Oprah's fault? And on a totally unrelated subject, what the hell is wrong with my fancy shmancy suits that they have been slowly shrinking over the past six months?

I am like lots of people, gotta move it more and worry about it less. Life is good, why focus on this? Oh, and I never got to the gym on Tuesday... was on the phone with my friend G hearing about the new guy in her life (tell me everything) and then played with Alfie. And yes was a pretty good episode of NCIS. I am so getting fat...

15 comments:

TICKLEBEAR said...

i also saw "dropdead diva" and surprisingly, i liked it!!!
:D~
HUGZ

Anonymous said...

Love Drop Dead Diva. Can watch them all on I-Tunes. Second season starts this summer on Lifetime.

Michael Rivers said...

The weight loss industry is so huge. So many people want to drop some pounds.

I did pretty good over the holidays, but I still need to get back into the gym. I'm feeling the need!

mama T said...

love it! (gonna try to check out drop dead diva, too).

Muffy St. Bernard said...

As somebody who is not attracted to thin bodies, I insist that other people should not worry about weight-appearance issues. But since I myself worry about my weight-appearance, I am an admitted hypocrite. I haven't resolved this yet.

And when I read about that beautiful.com purge, my first thought was "Oh those poor people who got kicked out!" and then I thought "Wait, think about all the OTHER people that THEY voted against while they were members...karma, bitches!"

Aaron said...

I think 80% of this is just marketing. I am so tired of seeing fit people jogging in the winter, are they crazy?? And why are the rubbing it in my face?
Now I admit to taking on a new diet and workout routine but that is more to fit my favorite clothes without looking like an aged twink thats let himself go a long time ago.
Do what makes you feel happy and healthy

Bejewell said...

I totally blame Oprah. She is the devil.

Brahm said...

Hey all - thanks for comments, agree with lots of it. And I LOVE the "karma bitches" to those website 'beautiful people' snobs!

Clare and Gary said...

I have some fancy smancy jeans that seem to have the same mysterious problem Brahm, let me know if you find out what is going on!

Lisa Page Rosenberg said...

Yes.
Now where can I find curried cashews and how have I lived this long without them?

Aunt Juicebox said...

Eh. I don't really feel sorry for the people who got kicked off beautiful people. I mean, come on? Narcissistic much? To join a site with that name in the first place? Wow.

Brent said...

Good post. I'd agree that it's mostly marketing, but enough marketing that it's firmly embedded in social consciousness by now! Unrealistic expectations make you likely to buy appearance improving products. (Unhappiness makes you more likely to buy any product)

Brahm said...

Love the comments, and especially thinking about lack of sympathy for the narcissists kicked of the 'beautiful on the outside' website by the skinnier beautiful people.... I love that part more and more!

Marketing is all about selling stuff --- and in my real life I sell stuff for a living --- I think it is all about how you do it (and what you sell); make people feel better, dont make them feel like less.

And yes Lisa curried cashews are awesome... they are cashews coated in sugar and curry, how could they be less than awesome???

Kevin said...

It is all Oprah's fault. All world evils are the result of Oprah. Or Martha Stewart.

Kyle said...

Brahm, don't focus on the weight, focus on being happy. If you don't like the weight, get rid of it, for yourself. If it doesn't matter, don't let anyone else bring you down because of your body's status. You should be able to be who you want to be. Living for others is fruitless in my book, and in the end, just makes you miserable.

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