October 16, 2010

What's your porn name...?

There's lots of ideas/theories/time wasters out there about how to find or create your porn name, your stripper name, and your Greek god name.

In my extensive research for this post (aka late night googling), I discovered there are websites devoted to generating your porn name, pirate name, gangsta name, whatever name you want. They don't tell you how or why, they just spew out a name. According to one of them, my pirate name is Sword Jugglin' Jack. Uh, really?

So back to the important stuff. Porn names. The two most common systems I found, and I use the word "system" very loosely, were:

Porn name = your middle name + the street you grew up on

and

Porn name = your pet's name + your favourite snack food.

So my porn name is either Daniel Finchley, or Alfred Allsorts.

Ooh, easy choice. I am taking Alfred Allsorts. Waaay dirtier.

What's your porn name?

17 comments:

Dazee Dreamer said...

My porn name would be either

Louise Wellington
or
Tigger Sugarcookie

What do you think?

Debra She Who Seeks said...

Hi, Alfred Allsorts. Tipster Cheezies here. When you get back home, there's a Prolific Blogger Award waiting for you over at my blog post of October 14th. Gotta go now. They're waiting for me on set.

John Gray jgsheffield@hotmail.com said...

kimmy bagel

Jabacue said...

Yikes!
Mine would be: Barry Chappell or Kitty Nuts

I like the latter.

Fragrant Liar said...

Well, mine are totally lame. Either Jayne Seventh or Pfatty Peanut Butter Cookies. But I see people making fun of me. I would suck at being a porn star. Or not...

Jason said...

Mine would be: Buddy Chocolate or Carlo Cardinal.

Neither are that great. :-(

Mads said...

Tuxedo Cheese sort of has a bizarre and yucky ring to it. I don't want to associate cheese with any of my body parts.

Gigi said...

Mine would be Sue Cromwell - hmmm, has more of a soap opera ring to it....

Damien Oz said...

OK - I would either be Peter Malaleuca or BJ Caramel.

middle child said...

Diane Streamwood Blvd. Or,..

Belle Chocolate

Lauren said...

Ugh, so not fair. Mine are awful. I'd be either Eleanor Airport or Meeko Chocolate. The only way mine are half decent is if you add a tagline... like... "land here". Or if I specified that Meeko is a cat. -coughs- moving on...

Brahm (alfred lives here) said...

Ok, lots of porn stars with the last name "chocolate" here. Is that wrong, or a new specialty film?

And Laurne, I agree the Eleanor Airport one is not great, sounds more like from a kids book. Or yes go dirty with the "land here" or something about onboarding?

Damien - BJ Caramel is the best one so far!

Brahm (alfred lives here) said...

Sue Cromwell sounds author-y.

Kitty Nuts definitely porn name!

DarkTouch said...

I'm fascinated by the theory that 'Porn Name' and similar Memes are created entirely by some dark cult of spammers looking to get their hands on your personal details so they can hack your accounts.

Fred Miller said...

Justin Beaver.

AbsolutelyPrimed said...

This is a great post! I hope you don't mind I linked to this in my last post...

My names...

Edith Fiftieth Ave (sooo not hot)

Riley Tiramisu (not sure that's any better)

Brahm (alfred lives here) said...

Ok I do like Edith Fiftieth Avenue one...

and of course I don't mind if you link to this post -- Link Away!

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